Miscarriage Poems by Mary Carey and Her Husband
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Upon Ye Sight of My Abortive Birth Ye 31th of December 1657
By Mary Carey
What birth is this; a poore despissed creature?
A little Embrio; voyd of life, and feature:
Seven tymes I went my tyme; when mercy giving
deliverance unto me; & mine all living:
Stronge, right-proportioned, lovely Girles, & boyes
There fathers; Mother's present hope't for Joyes:
That was great wisedome, goodnesse, power love praise
to my deare lord; lovely in all his wayes:
This is no lesse; ye same God hath it donne;
submits my hart, thats better than a sonne:
In giveing; taking; stroking; striking still;
his Glorie & my good; is. his. my will:
In that then; this now; both good God most mild,
his will's more deare to me; then any Child:
I also joy, that God hath gain'd one more;
To Praise him in the heavens; then was before:
And that this babe (as well as all the rest,)
since 't had a soule, shalbe for ever blest:
That I'm made Instrumentall; to both thes;
God's praise, babes blesse; it highly doth me please:
May be the Lord lookes for more thankfulnesse,
and highe esteeme for [of] those I doe posesse:
As limners drawe dead shadds for to sett forth;
ther lively coullers, & theyr picturs worth;
So doth my God; in this, as all things; wise;
by my dead formlesse babe; teach me to prise:
My living prety payre; Nat: & Bethia;
the Childrene deare, (God yett lends to Maria:)
(Psal: 119.65.)
Praisd be his name; thes tow's full Compensation:
For all thats gone; & yt in Expectation:
And if heere in God hath fulfill'd his Will,
his hand-maides pleassed, Compleatly happy still:
I only now desire of my sweet God
the reason why he tooke in hand his rodd?
What he doth spy; what is the thinge amisse
(Mica: 6.9)
I faine would learne; whilst I ye rod do kisse:
Methinkes I heare Gods voyce, this is thy [the] sinne;
And Conscience justifies ye same within:
Thou often dost present me wth dead frute;
Why should not my returns, thy presents sute:
Dead dutys; prayers; praises thou dost bring,
(Rev. 3. 1.)
affections dead; dead hart in every thinge:
In hearing; reading; Conference; meditation;
in acting graces & in Conversation:
Whose taught or better'd by ye no Relation;
thou'rt Cause of Mourning, not of Immitation:
Thou doest not answere that great meanes I give;
my word, and ordinances do teache to live:
Lively: o do't, thy mercyes are most sweet;
(Psal: 25.10.)
Chastisements sharpe; & all ye meanes that's meet:
(Heb: 12.6.)
Mend now my Child, & lively frute bring me;
(Psal: 119.71.65.)
so thou advantag'd much by this wilt be;
My dearest Lord; thy Charge, & more is true;
I see't; am humbled, & for pardon sue;
(Psal: 25.7.11.)
In Christ forgive; & henceforth I will be
(Mat: 3.17.)
what, Nothing Lord; but what thou makest mee;
(Dan: 9.17. Phil: 2.13.)
I am nought, have nought, can doe nought but sinne;
as my Experience saith, for I'ave ben in: (Rom: 7.18.19.24.)
Severall Condissions, tryalls great and many;
in all I find my nothingnesse; not any
Thing doe I owne but sinne; Christ is my all;
(Col: 3.11 Heb.7.25.)
that I doe want, can crave; or ever shall:
(I. John. 2.1.2.)
That good that suteth all my whole desires;
and for me unto God, all he requires;
It is in Christ; he's mine, and I am his;
(Cant: 2.16. & 6.3. &
7.10.)
this union is my only happynesse:
But lord since I'm a Child by mercy free;
Lett me by filiall frutes much honnor thee;
(John. 15.8.)
I'm a branch of the vine; purge me therfore;
(John. 15.2.)
father, more frute to bring, then heertofore;
A plant in God's house; O that I may be;
(Psal: 92.13.14.)
more florishing in age; a grouing tree:
Lett not my hart, (as doth my wombe) miscarrie;
but precious meanes received, lett it tarie;
Till it be form'd; of Gosple shape, & sute;
(Phil. 1.27 Col: 1.6.10.)
my meanes, my mercyes, & be pleasant frute:
In my whole Life; lively doe thou make me:
(Isa: 4.1.)
for thy praise. And name's sake, O quicken mee;
(Psal: 143.11.)
Lord I begg quikning grace; that grace aford;
quicken mee lord according to thy word:
(Psal: 119. 159.)
It is a lovely bonne I make to thee. (Psal: 119. 88. 37.)
after thy loving Kindnesse quicken mee:
(Psal: 119. 159.)
Thy quickning Spirit unto me convey;
and therby Quicken me; in thine owne way:
(Psal: 119. 37.)
And let the Presence of thy spirit deare,
be wittnessd by his fruts; lett them appeare;
To, & for the; Love; Joy; peace; Gentlenesse;
longsuffering; goodnesse; faith; & much meeknesse,
(Gal:
5.22.23.)
And lett my walking in the Spirit say,
I live in't; & desire it to Obey: (Gal: 5.25.)
And since my hart thou'st lifted up to the;
amend it Lord; & keepe it still with thee:
Written by my dear
Husband at ye Death of our 4th (at that time) only Child, Robert Payler
Dear wife, let’s learne to get that Skill,
Of free Submission to God’s holy Will;
He like a Potter is; & we like Clay,
Shall not ye Potter mould us his own Way?
Sometimes it is his Pleasure that we stand
With pretty lovely Baby’s in our hand:
Then he in wisedome turns ye Wheel about,
And drawes ye Posture of those Comforts out;
Into another Forme; either this, or that
As pleases him; & ‘tis no matter what:
If by such Changes, God shall bring us in
To love Christ Jesus, & to loath our Sin.
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